Still Wondering....

I still have more ideas in my head. I am just letting them swirl around for awhile. Sometimes it takes me awhile to work it all out where it makes sense. 

I'm liking this week. The weather is warm but rainy and I still like it. It is so Springlike. The irises are blooming and so are the pink bushes I have in my backyard. (No, they are not azaleas. They haven't bloomed yet) I even saw a hummingbird yesterday. Very cool! 

Evan only has a week left of her first year of college. I am glad she will be home for the summer. I am wondering what we are going to do with all her stuff though. Sort and pitch probably. And then store the rest until August. August will be here before we know it. Time marches on and seems to be double time!

Tomorrow night is book group. We will be discussing "The Priest". I am going to review my notes tonight. I'm anxious to see what they pick for us this time. I'm not sure who's turn it is to pick. I think Lisa G. We'll find out for sure tomorrow. I'll keep you posted. I added the gadget at the bottom of my page that lists the books I've read in 2009. I'm just going to keep a running list. Maybe I'll add a rating system. But like I said  before, I generally don't finish a really bad book. I just set it aside and eventually I finish it. 

I have reconnected with one of my best friends from Jr. High and High School on Facebook. She and I remained friends even after we had children until she moved out of state. I haven't seen her to talk to her in probably 10 years. We chatted forever last night. If nothing else, Facebook lets old friends reconnect. I love it!

Tech Testing is almost over. Two more days of Kindergarten and First Grade then only 7 more 2nd grade tests and we are finished. Then I have to tally all the scores. We test our children to see what they know and use the information for our Tech Grant. The tech grant is how we fund our lab and my job and all the tech equipment that comes in to our district. So I really have to teach the K through 2 crowd "something". :D  I think they are doing all right this year. There are always a few children that test like they have never been to class before. Oh well!

Ed used these verses Sunday night and I really, really like them so I'm going to share them with you. 

Isaiah 49:15

Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you! See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.

Isaiah 62:4-5

No longer will they call you Deserted, or name your land Desolate; But you will be called Hephzibah, and your land Beulah, for the Lord will take delight in you, and your land will be married. As a young man marries a maiden, so will your sons marry you; as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride, so will your God rejoice over you.

What Would People Think?

I think this is going to be more than one part. If I don't break it up, it will probably go on and on and on. My mind just keeps going and going on this subject. Last weekend at the women's retreat that I attended the main speaker, Lynn Reese and my sister both said the phrase, "What will people think or What would people think?" This truly made me reflect this week A LOT! 

When I was growing up, my grandparents lived in Broughton and we lived in Eldorado. My grandpa's family had owned several businesses in Broughton and were very well known. My grandparents owned a trucking business. So needless to say everyone in this small town knew my sister and I and who we belonged to. We were "Freddy Griswolds's daughters." Broughton is a small town. It has always been a small town. It was just thriving more in the 40's and 50's; so by the 60's and 70's there wasn't much there but the post office and a couple of little stores. The population was and still is today holding at 250. 

I loved going to Broughton. I had the run of almost the whole town even at a very young age because, of course, everyone knew who I was. This "knowing" also came with some headaches. I would be dying to get outside to play with my Broughton friends and my grandma would always stop me. She would always and I mean always stop and ask me if I had washed my face, my hands, and my elbows. (Yes, my elbows!) I don't remember one time that I was Marsha and just did it. I argued and argued that I was going out to play why did I need to clean up? Her response was always the same. "You never know who you might see and what would people think if they saw you dirty?" Because of who they were in the pecking order of the town, I had to be clean. They didn't want us to appear "poor and dirty". The up side to this is that I got to wear my shorts and t-shirts and not a dress. :D 

I went from being a small child always worried about "What would people think?" to a teenager and even a young adult worried about the same thing. Sometimes in there I worried a little about "What God would think?" but I was really more concerned about other people's opinions. In the back of my mind I figured if I had people's approval I also had God's. Is that a messed up view or what? I tried to live up to everyone else's expectations of how I was "supposed to be" instead of what God intended me to be. What a waste of 20 years or so! Needless to say I was never good enough or pretty enough or popular enough. (My daughter loves Hawk Nelson and they sink a song called Everything You Ever Wanted. It is speaking about my life and I really like it. Look it up on iTunes!) 

Since I was so concerned about what others thought of me I became very good at covering up. I lied, I cheated, I made excuses, I blamed others, and I wasn't a nice person. (OK, I know I am not perfect now; but I am letting God control the big parts now!) So, people saw me but they saw the fake me. The one I wanted the world to see. The one that tried to please everyone. The one that was obedient on the outside and VERY disobedient on the inside. I am very sorry that I lived my life that way. I think that is one of the reasons that I was so hard on my own children while they were growing up. Not about what others would think of them but always reminding them that God was the one who mattered. 

So "What would People Think?", I hope when they see me now they see the true genuine person that God created me to be. 

So much floating around...

I have so many thoughts floating around in my head right now. I went to the Women's Retreat at Flora with my sister's church (and others). It was AMAZING!!! This is why so much is going on in my brain. My friend Brigette and I got up very early Saturday morning, left here at 5:45 a.m. and got to Flora around 7:45. We, as always, talked non-stop. The funny, amazing, God-led thing about it is that almost every topic we touched on during the drive was somehow re-spoken during the day by someone. I can't say it enough...I LOVE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS! The women on the ministry team that Marsha worked with had been so faithful to God in all the details that He really blessed the day. A big thank you to all who were involved in the preparations and the carrying out of the day!

I'm trying to get my thoughts together about how I want to respond to the bits and bites that I walked away with. I will be posting about it, I hope, pretty soon. 

Yesterday I started Tech Testing in my computer lab. Each grade, Kindergarten, First and Second,  have a little test on Appleworks and Kidpix. These are our word processing and drawing programs. The second grade has a two part word processing test and first grade just has one part. Kindergarten only tests on Kidpix. First and second grade test on Kidpix too. We won't be finished until May 7. There are days I don't feel like I have taught these children anything but when I see them do the tasks I ask them to on their computer I know that all is not in vain. :D So I am keeping a very cheery attitude. :D

I promise I'll post my thoughts soon. (You can see this as a blessing or a threat. HA!!!)

It's Thursday and no new Gray's Anatomy. Hum...I wonder why? Maybe next week. Oh well. I know, I really shouldn't watch that show; but I really like it. 

I have worked out at Curves everyday this week. I think I'll take the day off tomorrow and not work out. I feel so much better when I exercise, though. Now if I could just stop eating chocolate I could lose another 20 pounds. :-D

I've been reading some other blogs. Some of them are so serious and some are fun and some are a little of both. I don't think my style fits any of them. I know, that is why I am "random". I'm not going to copy someone else's style because I think that's how it is supposed to look. I just want this to be silly and serious, useful and not so useful information at the same time. I think maybe so far I'm succeeding. What do you think?

We had Celebrity Readers at our school yesterday. This is where someone from the public, "A Celebrity", comes in to each classroom and reads to the children. They usually bring a snack and sometimes a small activity. All of our readers showed up this year or they got their own replacements. That was refreshing! Of course, there were cupcakes, sugar cookies, candy, juice boxes, chips, and ice cream. Which means ALOT of sugar! We even had 2 dogs. The readers usually dress up too, that's part of the entertainment. It's always a really fun day.

Yesterday was also the "Tea Party" Day at the Harrisburg Court House. I didn't participate but DeWayne did. It's makes me sad that the people in leadership of our country see this as a threat to "Homeland Security".  I wonder if I don't agree with everything that is presented to me in the years to come if I will be considered a huge threat. I'm am very proud of the people who participated in this event. This is just the kind of demonstration that our forefathers were in favor of. There were no ugliness. Only people who made speeches and informed the people. Our country is in really bad shape. It's not President Obama's fault and it's not even President Bush's fault (even though EVERYONE wants to blame him). The fault lies with us, the voters who continually put up with our lawmakers making bad laws, not reading what they push through and vote on,  allowing our government for the people,  by the people to seemingly have disappeared. I'm not usually very politically informed. I am a conservative because it seems to line up closest to Jesus. But there is so much junk that I SO do not agree with going on that I just have to say SOMETHING!!! We have got to vote. We have got to make our voices be heard. We have got to stand up and call for changes. The "Tea Party" just allowed concerned citizens to be heard. 

Enough said! (For now!)

Friday tomorrow! Saturday I'm going to a Ladies Retreat in Flora with my sister's church. My friend Brigette is going with me. It starts at 8 a.m. and it takes almost 2 hours to get there. So we will be getting up and leaving here VERY early. I'm looking forward to the retreat. My sister always puts on a good program. I'm very proud of all the hard work she does as the head of Women's Ministries at her church. Go Marsha!! 

Is it really over?

I cannot believe that I went a whole week and didn't write anything! And now Spring Break is over and I went back to work today. Fun!Fun! 

Last week actually didn't fly by like I thought it would. We had a nice leisurely week. DeWayne was on second shift all week so I  think that is why it didn't. No getting up early. Being able to stay up late. Eating lunch together everyday. The evenings were very quiet. All in all it was a very nice week. 

Monday I painted the downstairs bathroom like I planned. It turned out much better than I thought it would. We went back to Lowe's and bought a black vanity and mirror. So now the bathroom is black, white and gray with a few red accents. I only have to paint the 3-drawer chest black and it will be complete. (oh wait, DeWayne hasn't hooked the water up to the sink yet. :D  but he's working on it.) I can't believe it snowed this day too!

Tuesday I voted. YAY!!! The school board election went the way our teachers wanted it too. So we do have a voice and so do the parents of our school district. 

Wednesday and Thursday were days filled with laundry, dishes, just stuff. Nothing too hard. Evan got home very late Thursday after a late night concert in St. Louis with her friends. 

Friday just hanging out together. 

Saturday we went rock climbing at Jackson Falls with the Owens' family, David, Brigette, and Kaylynn. It was the first time the four of our family had been rock climbing for a long time. Dane climbed. Actually, everyone but me climbed. I, of course, took a lot of pictures. Fun day! 

Sunday we ate lunch with my mom and Jim. My sister and part of her family were there. Marsha, Randy, Holly, Madison, and Mallory. I love to be with her. I miss laughing at the most ridiculous stuff!

And today...I went back to work! It was a very laid back day. The kids were all really good. I ate too much chocolate though. Our P.E. teacher brought a lot of chocolate to fill up our "chocolate container" that everyone eats out of. Soooo...I ate a lot of chocolate eggs. They were really good. Evan and Dane both had off today. They both had business to take care of so that worked out. Evan has to start back to school tomorrow and Dane has a new job to start. He got transferred to a new company starting tomorrow. He will be working out of Evansville for a few months. He only works Tuesday through Friday, 10 hour days. He is excited about working a four day week for awhile and being in the same town as Evan. She has only 3 weeks of school left too. The Spring has really flown by!!! 

I finished The Priest. I am so thankful for Jesus. I am so glad that He is our High Priest and there is no longer any need for the sacrifices in the tabernacle to atone for our sin. I am so glad that He is the spotless lamb that took death for my sins. Most of all I am thankful that He sits on the throne next to His Father interceding on my part. What a SAVIOR!!!

A Good Day

DeWayne and I had the best time yesterday. I love to just drive around Southern Illinois and explore. We started at Alto Pass at the Bald Knob Cross. The initial plan was to then follow the River to River Race  route. When we got to the top of the hill (a really big hill), we ate our lunch while overlooking the Big Muddy River to the west. The view of the river bottoms and the lure of the Mississippi River made us change our plans. We drove over to Highway 3 and went to Grand Tower. It is right on the river. It's a very small, very old town. It's called Grand Tower because there is a tower of rock in the river. Very cool! There is also a suspension bridge holding the gas pipeline crossing the river there. It is also very cool. We then drove on north and crossed back over to Murphysboro and then came home. All in all this took all day. The weather cooperated and we had a beautiful, wonderful day. It was the perfect start for Spring Break. I needed a day of doing nothing taxing!!! 

I'm going to paint the downstairs bathroom tomorrow. Can't wait, really! I'm hoping that it motivates me to paint the other rooms that I need to paint. 

I've only got about 40 pages left to read in my book for book group. I really like it. I'm reading  Deuteronomy right now too so it's all going together. I love the way the Holy Spirit does that!  Very cool!

Dane has a new assignment for work. He goes back to Cape this week and next week he starts in Evansville for a new company. He will only work 4 days a week. He will be staying in a hotel too because they pay for his living expenses. So he will be bringing his camper home and parking it for awhile. He's very happy that he will be working 4 day weeks for awhile. He will also get to hang out with Evan if he wants!! :D

I love the rain. It makes it the perfect Sunday afternoon. Rain, coffee, a good book, and a blanket! Ahhhhh!

It's Finally Here!

Spring Break is finally here! I can turn off the alarm and wake up when I want to. Of course, that's a big joke because it will take my internal clock all week long to figure out that I'm not getting up at 5:30 a.m. every day. Oh well, I can always go back to sleep. Yay! Today was not a fast day. It seemed to crawl by. That is always the case when it's an early dismissal day. 

Speaking of early dismissal. Do parents read anything that comes home in their children's backpacks? We dismissed at 2 p.m. today because of Spring Break. I wait in the cafeteria with another aide with the children who get picked up. Some of the children are waiting on siblings who ride the shuttle from one of the other schools and some are just children who's parents still don't know that we get out at 2:40(on regular days) and show up at 3 p.m. Today, at 2:25 (25 minutes after the bell rang), there were still 8 children that had not been picked up and when I left at 2:30 there were still 2 children in the office that were waiting on a grown up. The early dismissal time was on the calendar that went home the first day of school. It was on the calendar that the children just took home Tuesday. It was on several notes that the children's teachers sent home. And it was announced yesterday at the end of the day. Sooooo, does anybody read the stuff that we send home from the school? When Dane and Evan were in school, not just grade school, but until they both graduated, I took the school calendar the first day of school and wrote down ALL the important times and dates on another calendar. If I picked my kids up after school, I thought I was late if I arrived 5 minutes before the bell. It's really sad because most of the people who are late are the ones who have no job and no commitments except the couch. O.K. I'll step off my soap box now. 

I am looking forward to tomorrow. DeWayne and I are going to spend the whole day together. I think we are going to take pictures. Can't wait. I'll post some this week.